Monday, March 30, 2009

Wrong, just WRONG!

Phyllis and I had a couple's massage this afternoon. I had hubby, she had the seven-month-pregnant wife. Very nice lady, but MY client? Meh.

I try to always give folks the benefit of the doubt, so when my client started twitching on the table, I thought, "Whatever."

Then I noticed he kept looking at his wife, and I thought, "Aw, cute! He's checking to see how his pregnant wife is doing!"

Not really. He was checking to see if she was watching HIM, because he was getting into the massage a leetle too much, if you know what I mean (and I KNOW you do!)
He was grinding into the table, and when I massaged his glutes, he lifted his hips up into the strokes, VERY disconcerting to me. I also think he had his hand underneath himself, fondling his junk, but I couldn't really tell under the sheet.

So when the massage was finally over, I felt like I needed a shower to cleanse myself.

The missus was waiting for hubby at the front desk, when Rhyan came trotting out of the men's spa and made a beeline for me. Apparently the mister got so revved up from the massage, he couldn't wait to get to the hotel room and get it on with the missus. Instead, he decided jacking off in the shower was a viable alternative! Ewwwww. I'm really glad it was a couple's massage and not individual, who knows what he'd have tried to pull if he had been alone with me in a treatment room. Oh, well. At least he was a good tipper!


Buck said...

I'm thinking you're gonna like the Wandering Masseuse gig a LOT better...

Trashman said...

I'm living proof the world is full of perverts.

Suldog said...

Well, see, as I told you a while back, this is why I prefer a male to give me my massage. If a female does it, I'd be close to being that guy.

(I wouldn't be that guy. I'd be close to it. I'd be thinking of it, is what I mean. I wouldn't actually... you get the point.)

If a male is touching me, no reaction other than to just enjoy the relaxation. Female? *BOING*

Anonymous said...

I can deal with the getting hard part, and hell I get hard in a massage when done with a female. It's the jerking off in the shower bit thats disturbing, while having an attendant watch thats really irking me. Otherwise the stiffy is normal. ;)

Dave (aka Buckskins Rule) said...

I can't imagine being so hard up (pun intended) that I would need to rub one out in a (semi) public shower.

What a sad man.

skywind said...

In our lives, mistakes are inevitable. As long as a wrong recognize that the wrong reasons, then we still have opportunities.
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Christina RN LMT said...

Buck, it was a slow night tonight (according to the other therapists there), but I still had fun. The energy is of course completely different than at a spa, and the MUSIC is MUCH better, naturally! I still love working in the spa, you get weirdos once in a while, no matter where you work.

Trashman, but you're a pervert with style, if that makes sense...;)

Suldog, so many men are unfortunately so very, very homophobic that they can't stand even the idea of a man touching them, much less the actual massage. Which is sad, because the male therapists really get the short end of the stick all the way around.

Anonymous, trust me, I know erections are normal. I really don't care and barely even notice them anymore. But the massage itself is therapeutic, not erotic, so it bothers me when the client is trying to turn it into something it's not (by grinding, etc.). I don't care so much about the jerking off, either, but question the location. Plus, he has a wife, so wtf? He can't get it on with her?!

B.R., yeah, that's what bothered me, too. Especially considering that his pregnant wife was waiting for him at the front desk of the spa...can you say AWKWARD?!

Skywind...hmmmmm. Don't quite know what to say, I think something was lost in translation.

HollyB said...

Like the comments above, I can understand the erection.
But the grinding on the table and masturbating in the shower, YUCK, Shudder, repeat with gagging.

Word verification? Fangspee!

Christina RN LMT said...

Holly, yup, you and me BOTH. Ugh.

Zelda said...

It was a good thing. He gave himself the happy ending and he tipped you.!

Christina RN LMT said...

Zelda, you're right! That's exactly how I should look at it. See, I need you to point me in the right direction!

Anonymous said...

I am really liking Zelda's way of thinking, LOL!!!

phlegmfatale said...

That one pegs the yuck-meter. Ew.

Home on the Range said...

oh GROSSSSSS. I don't know how you cope with the occasional perv.