Sunday, June 14, 2009

Only in Vegas...

We were really slammed yesterday at the spa. Phyllis was needed at our sister property next door, Ed took one look at the empty schedule and decided to go home at nine AM (we didn't start filling up until 10; he's a dipshit, basically), so Jarvis and I were the only therapists on duty.

Right before lunch, Jarvis had a one-hour Swedish massage with a male client scheduled. He got the client, showed him where to go and what to do, but when Jarvis entered the room to begin the massage, he got a little surprise...

NOT SAFE FOR WORK. CLICK AT YOUR OWN RISK...


Yes, that is a dildo on top of a folded one-hundred-dollar bill. Jarvis took one look at it and whipped out his cell to take a pic. I don't know if it was just wishful thinking on the client's part, or if he was confused as to what kind of services we provide at our spa, but Jarvis took it all in stride. He explained we didn't do those things, and told the client where he could go if he had that kind of happy ending in mind. Jarvis has been around town a long time, he knows that kinda stuff.

Honestly, Jarvis has class. I'm not sure how I'd react in the same situation, but guaranteed I would NOT react with such aplomb!

Only in Vegas, I tell ya.

19 comments:

Squeaky Wheel said...

LOL!

Blondefabulous said...

Ohmigawd! Ohmigawd! Ohmigawd!

I think I would have just walked right back out of the room!

Christina LMT said...

The amazing thing is, and I forgot to mention this in the post itself, Jarvis still did the massage as scheduled! Can you imagine? I'd have been way too squicked out, but Jarvis truly is unflappable.

Adam said...

I was gonna ask where he had the dildo hidden on (or in) him while he arrived for his massage... But then I seen the pic and it's small enough to fit in a pocket. so NVM :P

(I guess I'm used to seeing huge rubber dildos that would probably be too big to fit anywhere anyways)

HollyB said...

I'd like to know HOW this client reacted to his massage. Tent pole or shy worm?

Anonymous said...

How was his tip? I bet it might have been that hundred after all, especially if he handled the whole situation like u said. Definitely worth a $100 tip in my mind. LOL, what was this person thinking? Lomi Lomi, I guess!

Christina LMT said...

Adam, I'm not even going to ask the most obvious question that occurs to me...:P! (And thanks for stopping by!)

Holly, this is a very good question. Jarvis is off today but I'll ask him tomorrow.

Anonymous, also a valid question. I'll ask Jarvis this one, too.
Lomi lomi massage involves stuff like this?! I did not know that. I thought it was just a special, Hawaiian-style massage modality. Hmmmm, must investigate...;)

Zelda said...

What an interesting story. One's first inclination is to wonder what oneself would have done in that situation, and I can honestly say I'm stumped. I'm just wondering if $100 would be enough to tempt me and if it was, what exactly I would have done with the device. If there were no instructions, I think I might have just rammed it home.

Christina LMT said...

You know what just occurred to me? What if the client was an undercover cop doing a sting? It's possible, I suppose, though they usually conduct sting operations in the local "massage parlors", not spas. Hmmmm, must ponder.

Buck said...

O. M. F. G.

The things I read here. Jarvis is a better man than I. Srsly.

Dick said...

I promise. I won't do it again, this week.

Dick
www.bigdicksplace.com

Leslie said...

OMG! If that had happened here I would have started laughing hysterically.

Buckskins Rule said...

Ummm...wow...

That's pretty desperate.

Christina LMT said...

Buck, that's why I had to have the picture. I didn't think anyone would have believed me otherwise!

Dick, Jarvis thanks you.

Leslie, I think I would have been too shocked to laugh. Then I'd have informed the client his service was over, and that security would be coming for him. I don't fuck around with my license!

Buckskins Rule, I dunno about desperate, but it was pretty sad.

Roismhaire said...

I'm thanking God that it's "only in Vegas"! I would have lost it.
Your work colleague is Mr. Cool.

4chun Cookie said...

LoL I would have totally used it on him!! But that's just me! =D

Christina LMT said...

Texas is looking more attractive every day, Roismhaire! Jarvis IS Mr. Cool, to be sure.

Cookie, why am I not surprised...? ;)

TallyAngel said...

...wow...

Christina LMT said...

Oh, Swell. My child has read this post. I'm going to hell.