Take tonight, for example.
My friend Liz celebrated her graduation from UNLV this evening. Due to work, I wasn't able to attend the commencement this morning, but I was able to make it to the open house/party at her sister's house this evening.
I'm not a party person. One-on-one, I have the gift of gab, I can talk to anyone and be sincere, because I'm honestly interested in people. But put me in a social situation where I'm surrounded by strangers, and I'm extremely uncomfortable.
Tonight, I walked into the house, greeted my hosts, and was set adrift. Why, why, why can't I LIKE this sort of thing?! I made a real effort, and talked to a bunch of people, but I fear I was babbling. Until my friend Dr. B. showed up and rescued me, THANK GOD! He also went above and beyond by being cool enough to call in a prescription for antibiotics for me, since I'm afraid I'm getting bronchitis (I know the signs).
The food was delicious and homemade, the music was soothing, the night soft and lit by the moon. And (almost) the whole time I was wishing I was home with my dogs.
If Silver had been with me, it might have been different, though I hate to think I might use my daughter as a crutch. But she was marching with her school band at the Helldorado Parade, and was unable to be there.
Oh, well. I guess I just have to accept myself for who and how I am, instead of wishing for the moon. I'm a homebody and a borderline hermit, and dammit, I like it!