A few days ago G., the lead aesthetician at the spa, celebrated her birthday.
My colleague B. brought in a delicious cake and we performed the obligatory serenade before scarfing down the goodies.
One of us asked, "Anybody got milk?"
B., mother of an infant and currently breastfeeding, jokingly raised her hand, causing all of us to start laughing.
I was staring at B., a bizarre thought in my head, and she caught me at it.
Busted!
B.: What?!
Me: Oh, it's nothing, really!
B.: Seriously, what's going on?
Me: Well, I was just wondering...if a lactating woman were stranded on a desert island, how long could she survive by living off of her own breast milk...?
B.: You're weird, you know that? You read too much!
(Implying, I suppose, that all the fiction I read makes my imagination go wild.)
Me(thinking): *That's not possible. There's no such thing as reading too much.*
12 comments:
Well Christina I don't think you're weird (much) at all. I'd have said the something similar. As for reading too much? Pshaw! That just ain't possible. Only weridos read too little!
That's what I say!
As long as she finds a cup to express the milk in or she must have VERY good aim!
I find reading fiction a waste of time and a form of intellectual masturbation.
Reading nonfiction however is intellectual fornication, where the degree of pleasure derived is positively correlated with the degree of substance and value to the writing.
Blah-blah-blah, GB!
;)
Masturbation? Bring it!
Fornication? Bring it!
It's all good.
Now that I'm going to be starting school, I'm sure I'll have plenty of non-fiction to read, and if I recall correctly, aren't you the HUGE LOTR fan?!
In my youth, yes. Now I prefer more substantive "stuff".
In your "youth"?!
Because you're so very, very old now...
Old as in being old enough to be the father of some of the new engineers my company has hired lately.
I'm gonna start calling you "Old Fart"!
I was in a rush before, but wanted to say this story is HIGH-LARIOUS! I mean, it makes sense. You're stuck somewhere, and by golly, ya gotta have moisture. I'm guessing the boobs would dry up super-fast, too, but in the meantime...
My brain just works in (mysterious...) strange ways.
Hey, if you have enough water to drink, I think the milk might keep going for quite a while.
I was going for nutrition/food with this. Don't know why.
It would be a form of self-cannibalism, wouldn't it?
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