Thursday, October 11, 2007

College Fair

Silver and I spent an hour at the Las Vegas College Fair this evening. I really don't know why we bothered, since she already knows where she wants to go to college...University of North Dakota at Grand Forks!
We did meet an admissions advisor for UND, so it wasn't a total waste of gas to head over there.

He was very nice and answered several questions.

We walked around when we were finished, and I noticed a lack of certain recruiters.

Army - check

Nevada National Guard - check

USMC - well, the booth was there but it was empty!

USAF - AWOL

USN - AWOL

I wonder why?




Had a set of twenty-something identical twins come into the spa today, just getting day passes. Here's the kicker...one was chubby while the other was slim.

You DON'T want to be known as the "fat twin"!

I have twin daughters who are almost 14, and they look quite different from each other right now, since they are progressing through puberty at different rates.

They've always detested being mistaken for one another,
not wearing the same outfit once they were able to make their preferences known, often sporting different hairstyles, etc.

But I don't think they'd take it that far!




I was leaving work the other day and got stuck in the parking garage behind a minivan with California plates.

They flagged down the bicycle-security guard, and after a brief conversation, he took off and they followed.

After they had made it to the exit, I rolled my window down and asked the security dude to confirm my suspicion...

Yup, I was right.

They had asked him to lead them to the exit of the parking garage!

They also told him they'd been driving around the garage for half-an-hour looking for the exit.

Granted, the layout of the garage is somewhat confusing, and it IS claustrophobia-inducing, but COME ON!!

Keep heading down, and then follow all the frickin' signs that say "EXIT".

Sheesh.




On Monday I headed to a medical spa for some skin treatments (I'm holding on to at least the appearance of semi-youth with tooth and nail!).

Among the display of business cards of related providers, I found this gem:

Intimate Makeover...Because Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

-Reconstructive Pelvic Surgery
-Labial Reduction
-Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation


Okay, you've had an accident or some kind of illness, and you need reconstructive surgery, fine.

But why the fuck would you want a doctor to cut up your labia...because you think they're too big?!

As all men (and women!) know, SIZE DOESN'T MATTER!

Right? Right?

And I don't even want to know what "Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation" is. It gives me the heebie-jeebies just to write it.




Because, even though this is my blog, I don't want to be utterly and completely narcissistic, I've decided against writing an entire post about what the man of my dreams should be like. I'll just pepper qualities I'm looking for throughout my posts, and you'll never know when...

Here's number one on my wish list...He has to love me.
Sounds like a no-brainer, right? Well, too many women seem to LOVE being in love with someone who doesn't love them back. I've been there and it sucks. So no more!

8 comments:

phlegmfatale said...

vagical reconstruction is just too disturbing to think about, seriously! I mean, WTF!

Yes, in matters of the heart, sometimes it's best to be vague!

phlegmfatale said...

http://xavierthoughts.blogspot.com/search?q=answering+machine

found it - you've got to go listen to this - I can't get enough of this one!

Christina said...

Too funny, Phlegm!

Thanks for the heads-up, I love the S.U.I.T.!

SFC B said...

Because the Army recruiters are the only ones who are under enough pressure to think that a college recruiting fair will be productive. The USN and the USAF know that they'll have enough dumbass kids walk in because they want the free college money but think that, being in the AF or the Navy means they won't have to see combat, that they don't need to do a fraction of the work the ground services need to do.

The USMC probably just forgot to go.

Christina said...

SFC B, thanks for dropping by!

I really wondered about that.

The recruiters were mobbed, by the way.

I took a moment to thank an Army recruiter and a National Guard recruiter for what they do, firm handshake included.

My daughter told me not to post about it, lest I sound like I'm bragging, or something, but I thought you'd appreciate it.

comatus said...

I think you've stumbled on something new in blog commenting here: several overlapping, yet tastefully disparate, posts with just one comment box. Minor grammatical or syntactical comment errors may be deadly! It's a laff fest! USMC forgot to show up...as Man of Your Dreams, or for the cosmetic reconstruction thing? We've just got to work in the lost Californians and the twins, and it'll be unintentional comedy gold. C'mon, admit it's on purpose.

Phlegm?: Dat Nasty.

Christina said...

Comatus, it's all just to keep everyone on their toes!

You've got to pay attention to comment here.

Actually, I'm such a comment-whore, I don't give a flying fuck what anyone comments about.

Comment on the weather in Greenland, and I'll be tickled pink!

Christina said...

Notice I worked "comment" in four times. Not bad, not bad at all...