Monday, February 16, 2009

Tattoos, Balls, and a Tip

As Angie* and I were in a couple's massage, she kept urging me to look at her client, the female half of the couple we were working on. Finally, I worked my way around hubby and took a gander at Milady's back. There, in big, bold letters, I found the following:


Obviously, Milady is NOT an English major.

Later in the day, I worked on one of my regular clients. Since I saw him last, he added a big-ass tattoo to his upper back/shoulder area. It reads:

Product of Sin City

Angie joked afterward that maybe he was conceived in Vegas and was forced to stay here. After all, "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas!"

I have grown a set of balls. In what way, you ask? Because I finally summoned the intestinal fortitude to call nasty forgetful women on their lack of handwashing after using the toilet. And I still got tipped and nobody complained to my boss.
After observing my clients leave the stall and head in my direction, bypassing the sinks, I merely asked politely, "Would you like to wash your hands? We have plenty of time."
I think it would take a woman with even greater balls to reply, "No." to my request!

And finally, here's a tip: Don't chew gum when getting a massage. Not only is it dangerous, because you could fall asleep and choke on it (or it could fall out of your mouth and get stuck in your hair or our carpet), but it's also EXTREMELY ANNOYING. Thank you.

* I decided it was silly to keep using first letters only when describing my colleagues, it gets too confusing, and I don't think my co-workers mind!


Single Girl in Sin City said...

(I heard, not saw) that my boyfriend's uncle has a tattoo of all the looney tunes characters fishing on his ass. All the fishing lines lead to the anus.....Gross!

Christina LMT said...

Gross and OW! That must have been extremely painful to get. Glad you clarified that you hadn't seen it yourself...;)

Buck said...


Maybe she was unmarried? But that would still "date" her if and when she changes her marital state...

re: "Angie joked afterward that maybe he was conceived in Vegas and was forced to stay here. After all, 'What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas!'"

LOL! THAT'S great!

Christina LMT said...

Buck, it's not just the extra "s", the word is (should be) mischievous. There's no "i" after the v! After all, the noun is "mischief"...:)
But, yeah. We thought maybe she's single, that's why "Miss". She was getting a massage with her boyfriend, though, so who knows how appropriate that tattoo will be in a while!
I thought Angie was being particularly witty, and I laughed, too!