Saturday, April 26, 2008

"We'll have a gay, old time!"

No, not the Flintstones, unfortunately.

There's been some kind of gay event going on in town, I don't have a clue what it is because, really, I don't care.

HOWEVER, it's lead to some activity at the spa I thought I'd share with you, my precious readers.

Three gay guys walked into the spa (sounds like a bad joke, I know), two of them were a couple and the third a friend of theirs. J., the attendant, is from Peru, and his English is some ways from being perfect, but I'll try to recreate verbatim what he told me at lunch yesterday...

J.: The one man, he says, "You so handsome, when you off work?", then he try to touch my face!

Me: Oh my GOD! What did you do?

J.: *swinging his left hand in a short arc*
I do "Miyagi-san BLOCK"! Then I say, "You can see, but you can't touch!"

Me: *laughing* Wax on, wax off!

J.: *nodding* Yes! Then later, they having sex in the jacuzzi!

Me: WHAT?!

J.: *smacking his fist into his palm* Like this!

Me: Did you call security?!

J.: No, they were almost finish.


J.: I don't like when I have to stop, so I no stop them.

Me: Arrgggh!

After lunch, this led to a conversation with our lead therapist, who had only heard that the gentlemen had been "touching" each other, not about the full-on sex. Considering how truly awful it would be for our spa to get a reputation in certain circles, I'm afraid we're going to have to be hard-asses about this sort of thing in the future, pun not intended. Not to mention that we could have ugly fights on our hands, should some straight guy get propositioned or witness the sex acts.

I'd like to know why these men feel it's in any way appropriate to have sex in a public place, not to mention the one guy repeatedly sexually harassing the staff (J. said that the single dude grabbed his thigh, but he did his "Miyagi-san BLOCK!" again.)

Oh, well. The potential of being caught in the act probably added to the thrill.


Blondefabulous said...

Eeeewwwwwwww! Please tell me you guys drained the jacuzzi! I don't care if it's straight people having sex, or gay people having sex..... don't put your bodily fluids where other people go to enjoy relaxation! Yuck! I hope what happened in the jacuzzi didn't stay in the jacuzzi...... lol!

Sonja said...

MAN! I'm going to really stop eating while reading blogs.

Christina LMT said...

The jacuzzis get drained and cleaned every night while we're closed (thank GOD). But yeah, that's just gross. Get a room, people! We have plenty of 'em here at the hotel with hot tubs, so have at it.

Sonia, should I have "gross alerts"?
I'll do it if you think I should!

Lin said...

Achhhh! Absolutely, get a room and stop porking in spas and outey parades. Class is class, dignity is dignity and should remain that way for ALL of us.
Christine, maybe try a bucket of cold water on them next time - seems to work in kennels at least.

Christina LMT said...

Next time, Security WILL be summoned and they'll get kicked out of the spa (and possibly the hotel, too!)

Romaine said...

Keep up the good work.