Thursday, January 03, 2008

New Year's Resolutions 2008

From now on, I resolve to always draft my blog posts in Notepad first. That way I can avoid the frustration of having my posts vanish mysteriously during publishing.

I had written a nifty post about a lady with a hot bod who insisted on prancing about the spa nekkid, but I really don't feel like recreating the whole thing.

So just use your imaginations.

I also resolve to take better care of myself when doing hot stone massages. Yes, it feels great to the client when the stones are really, really hot, but I don't have to practically give myself first-degree burns on the palms of my hands to do a good job.

Today I only had two massages, one at 9:30 AM and the other at 3:00 PM. Talk about a day that drags and drags and drags...well, you get the idea!

The lady in the morning would have benefited from a shower. She was super nice and we chatted during the entire massage, but she smelled.

Turns out she literally rolled out of bed, saw her companions were still sleeping, and decided to head over to the spa to see if we had any openings.

Before the massage was scheduled to begin, she had half-an-hour to shower, but she just threw on her robe, sat in the lounge area, and talked on her cell phone.

She reeked of sweat and smoke from the casino, and I could tell while doing the scalp massage I was dealing with yesterday's hairspray.

After the massage she headed into the jacuzzi, THEN she took a shower and did the typical grooming stuff.


When I headed to the front desk to pick up the ticket for my three o'clock, I was greeted by three extremely excited young women.

"Oh my God! Christina, you won't believe how hot this guy is!"

"His eyes, his smile...!"

"He's totally built, you're so lucky!"

Etc., etc., ad nauseam.

After I retrieved my client from the men's spa and escorted him to the treatment room, I had a moment while he was situating himself on the table to run up front to tell the girls one thing...

"Oh, puh - LEAZE."

I guess what you find hot at 21 differs substantially from what you find hot at 37!

Thank GOD.


phlegmfatale said...

No shit! To think of the standards I had at 21. Sheesh!

Oh, and about vehicles? there's only one appropriate vehicle for a man in my humble opinion, and that's a pickup truck. Yeah, jeeps are okay, but nothing fancy, if you please. Be a man, for goodness' sake!

Christina RN LMT said...

I'm pretty indifferent to vehicles, but I draw the line at fuzzy dice and goofy vanity plates/bumper stickers.

And my client? He was okay, but way too small. I like a man who makes ME feel petite, which is a pretty tall order!

Basically, I want a man with some meat on him! Rowr...

Chuck said...

Oh man...I wish we could have heard about the hot naked woman! Not that everything else you write about isn't interesting as well! lol

Christina RN LMT said...

She was definitely hot, but the problem was, she knew it better than anyone, and was determined to FLAUNT it.

For two days.

She really annoyed the other guests, but we therapists were too chicken to say anything to her. We tried to hint, but she was oblivious.

We're talking, bending over in front of people to pick up a fallen magazine, brushing her teeth, putting on make-up and doing her hair...all nekkid.

And she had no concept of personal space! "Oh, Christina? Do you guys have toothbrushes for the guests?"

Thisclose to me, to where I was forced to back up! And, boy, did I rigorously maintain eye-contact!

Anonymous said...

I promise to stop staring at women's breasts....
Well, that turd flew out the window. Maybe next year.

Christina RN LMT said...

Why bother, Anonymous?

I thought New Year's Resolutions were for giving up things that are bad for you, anyway.

Anonymous said...

Oops, that was me C.


Christina RN LMT said...

I kinda figured, Dick...


4chun Cookie said...

He was no Rob huh?? I'm still smitten by him!!

Christina RN LMT said...

Nope, no Rob.

He looked sorta like a mini-me version of Vin Diesel, whom I DO have the hots for.

Not close enough, though.

4chun Cookie said...

I'd still do the mini-me version! LoL....