Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Drama!

Turns out my roommate is having a little feud with our next-door neighbor. Or maybe I should say our neighbor is feuding with my roommate!

I was at WalMart yesterday evening when I got a call from Keith, my roommate. I heard some voices and a LOT of barking in the background. He said, "Animal Control is here. Where do you keep Harley's and Tucker's rabies tags?"

After I told him where their collars were, he ended the call with no further explanations, and I wrapped up my shopping as quickly as I could and headed home.

Everything was quiet when I got there, including Keith, who was quietly seething.

The neighbor called Animal Control and reported him for having "Fifteen dogs, all jammed into that tiny house!" Which was a lie, by the way. There were only eight dogs in the house at the time, and five of them were OURS. Stupid bint.

The visit by Animal Control was actually anticlimactic. They didn't expect him to let them inside the house, but he did. He also immediately produced his business license for them to peruse, which spiked their guns quite nicely. They also commented on how clean the house was, for having so many dogs in it. Well, YEAH. Hello? It's his business, and he's extremely organized and fanatical about cleanliness, despite being something of a slob personally. (No offense, Keith!)

What I'm worried about is that Keith not only gets mad, he also gets even. This was merely the opening salvo in a resurgence of a battle between him and our neighbor, one I was unaware of.

He has already retaliated in one way: He has security cameras outside the house, and he showed the nice Animal Control officers footage of our neighbor's Lab, off-leash, crapping in our front yard. Which our neighbor did not pick up, of course. This means two citations for her.

I'm really afraid this is going to get ugly, fast.

I'll keep you all posted if anything else happens.

12 comments:

Suldog said...

Oh, goodness. Two things...

First, is "bint" a combined form of B**ch and C**t? If so, it's genius.

Second, my time on jury duty - 8 wasted days - was spent adjudicating a case that began a bit like what you describe and then escalated into all-out warfare, resulting in arrests, lawsuits, etc. Please be the voice of reason!

Christina RN LMT said...

LOL! "Bint" is a slightly derogatory word for girl that the Brits use. I just appropriated it...but if that's how they came up with it, I heartily approve!

Jim, believe me, I was trying to talk him down most of the evening. I don't know how successful I was.

Turns out the wooden fence he erected in the front yard to separate the two properties was because of the neighbor's Lab's propensity for pooping in our yard. Doesn't seem to have been very effective, though.

He's just pissed off that people don't mind their own business.

Buck said...

I'm really afraid this is going to get ugly, fast.

Aiiieee. Jim's comment is the perfect illustration and his posts about the trial are hilarious (you could say I'm being redundant here, as 94.7% of his posts are hilarious). But yeah: Be the Voice of Reason. And watch your back.

Christina RN LMT said...

Oh, believe me, Buck, I WILL. I don't trust the neighbors on that side as far as I could throw them.

SCI-FI said...

Seems like Keith got the last laugh (so far). Video taped evidence of The Bint's bowser dropping a bomb on your lawn, ending with *two citations* for her? WIN!

You could always suggest to Keith that nothing succeeds like success, and since he has his ducks in a row (clean house, rabies tags up to date, cameras to surveil the property, etc), he's in a position where The Bint implodes, allowing him time to laugh and plot his next defensive move. Either that or just shut off the video cameras for an hour, pick up a handful of dog-poo, and lob it at her front door. Either/or.

Christina RN LMT said...

He said something today about taking pictures of their decrepit house and mailing them to their landlord...

Yuri Orlov said...

Flaming bags of doggy doo on the front porch are a classic means of revenge.

;-)

Christina RN LMT said...

That's very Halloween, too!

Anonymous said...

Bastards. If they had got our dogs taken away...

Christina RN LMT said...

Silver, that would never happen! They'd have to find GROSS abuse and/or neglect before they remove a pet from its owner.

Anonymous said...

People often comment on how "thin" our dogs are, mom. How "skinny" they are.

Christina RN LMT said...

Silver, you don't think an animal control officer knows how an Italian Greyhound is supposed to look? You don't think they looked around and saw that their food dishes were full and that they had fresh water? C'mon.