Saturday, February 20, 2016

It was very satisfying...

as long as I held my breath!

I disimpacted a patient for the first time, w00t!

I don't think I needed a bachelor's degree for this, though.

Sunday, February 14, 2016

Enough to make a sailor blush...

Oh, the things one overhears at Phlegmfest!

Out of context, they are by turns disturbing and/or raunchy.

"I love restraints!"

"Just the tip is in the mouth, you know it's not all the way in."

"I'm sorry I put my fingers on your wiggly bacon!"

It's one of those gatherings where several fascinating conversations are going on simultaneously, and you just wish you could listen to and participate in every one.

Quotes are being tossed around and people break out into song spontaneously, and nobody bats an eye.

And the food? Scrumptious!!!

I'm having a blast!

And I'm very thankful that despite dozing off every evening among the crowd, I have yet to wake up with a dick drawn on my face in sharpie. True friendship.  Thanks, Y'all!

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Leaving on a jet plane...

Heading to TEXAS for Phlegmfest!

Dunno what kind of shenanigans might ensue, but with THIS crew, anything is possible!
I might or might not keep you posted, depends on many factors, one of which is my disdain of typing large amounts of text on my phone. Ugh.

I'm so excited to see so many of my friends who live so far away. I missed Blogorado last year, which made me sad, but I'm hoping I'll make it this fall. I already put in for the vacation time. ;)

Here's hoping my trip out is, bus, plane, car...we'll see!

Friday, January 22, 2016


I had the worst day ever today. I thought yesterday was bad, but today was several orders of magnitude worse.

At the end of my shift, after giving report, when I FINALLY started documenting, a long-time unit secretary/CNA (yes, she does BOTH) came up to me and asked, only half-jokingly,

"Whose oatmeal did you piss in to get THIS shitty assignment?!"

I dunno...God's?!

It wasn't supposed to be a bad day, but my patients had other ideas.

One died. One crashed. One was discharged (yay!). One's anxiety made him a huge PITA. And throw in an admission right at the end, and I was completely wrecked.

But, I work on an awesome unit where everyone pitches in to help, so that made a tremendous difference. Everything got done. All meds were given. All my patients were safe (yes, even the lady who died). Documentation is a nurse's bane, however.

I finally clocked out at 2107, picked up Tally, and headed to a local Irish pub. Good food, good music, and now I'm for bed. Luckily I don't go back to work until tomorrow night, so I can sleep in.

I just hope that the feeling that I don't know wtf I'm doing wears off soon...*sigh*.

Friday, January 15, 2016

I'm a REAL nurse now!

Clocked in at 0640 and didn't pee until 1905.

Monday, December 28, 2015

Why I became a nurse.

I admitted an elderly gentleman early yesterday morning, about half-way through my overnight shift. He came from the ED, extremely cachectic, with a diagnosis of "Failure to Thrive", which I thought only applied to newborns and infants.

He was withdrawn and monosyllabic, and I felt bad to be poking and prodding him with my admission assessment and placing of pressure ulcer preventatives, etc., when it was obvious he just wanted to be left alone.

When I came on last night, my third overnight in a row, after receiving report I walked into his room and reintroduced myself,

"Hi, Mr. Top! Do you remember me? I'm Christina, and I was the nurse who took care of you when you arrived on our unit last night."

He smiled slightly and said,

"You're the lady who got me all that apple juice!"

That he remembered me for THAT of all things, something nice I did for him, rather than the various indignities I subjected him to, absolutely made my day. Nothing got me down for the rest of my shift, not even when a patient's ileostomy bag exploded.

These moments are totally why I became a nurse. It makes everything worth it.

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Merry Christmas!

So, all my children are here for the holidays, yay! (Actually, TallyAngel, my older twin, moved in with me the day after Thanksgiving, so she was already here...).

Unfortunately, Silver (my oldest) has had a wicked sore throat and can only talk in whispers (99% sure it's NOT strep throat, so I'm not dragging her unnecessarily into an urgent care, even though she wants me to).

Work is going well. I've been working a lot of nights lately, and except for the sleep deprivation, I like it. It's more peaceful. So to speak.

I had my first patient die. It was expected and welcome (he was on Comfort Measures Only), but I wasn't expecting him to die on my shift, nor was I anticipating that I would be the one to discover him, moments after he passed. He was still very warm. It was a good experience, though, and he died at peace and pain-free. My charge nurse said I did a great job, so there's that.

In other news, if you're friends with me IRL/on Facebook, you know that Tucker, one of my pups, has been very sick and almost died. As a matter of fact, he's definitely still not out of the woods, though he's holding his own right now. He has idiopathic autoimmune hemolytic anemia. That's a mouthful! (That's what SHE said!)
His own body has been attacking and destroying his red blood cells, for no known reason, leading to extreme anemia and all that goes with it. I'm taking him in this coming Monday for more bloodwork, so hopefully the labs will reflect what I see in him, namely that he is improving! He's eating again (and pooping!), and he wants to go on walks, even though he's very slow. He still gets fatigued really easily. And the steroids he's on make him drink and pee excessively, but that's just how it goes.

And that's about all I've got right now! My life is pretty boring. ;)

Have a very Merry Christmas! If you're Jewish, I hope your Hanukkah was awesome! Ditto with Festivus and Kwanzaa! (Have I covered everyone? Oh, wait! Wiccans, happy Winter Solstice!)

And for EVERYONE: I hope 2016 brings good health, happiness, and prosperity to you and your families!

And dear GOD, please don't let Trump or Hillary or Bernie be president!

Sunday, November 29, 2015

I'm a BIG girl now!

The training wheels have come off! I just completed my first full week off of orientation!

No preceptor anymore, just me...all by myself...trying not to kill any of my patients.


So far, so good. We'll see how it goes later this week, when I work three days in a row.

I just had my first overnight shift (by myself), it was excellent, actually. Though  now I feel like a zombie. I think I'll watch the last episode of "Jessica Jones" and go back to bed.


Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Nope, not tea.

Then there was the elderly patient who asked me politely to dump the contents of his cup down the drain before he could accidentally drink it. When I asked him why he was worried about drinking his iced tea, and that I could get him some more ice, he told me he thought he had mistaken his empty cup for a urinal in the middle of the night and peed in it.

I carefully set the cup back down and said, "Let me get some gloves..."

And I made sure to document the dark amber color of his urine.

BTW, he had THREE urinals at his bedside!