Yes.

Yes, Ms. Walmart Cashier Lady, pickles are indeed former cucumbers. I know it's weird, but that doesn't make it untrue.

Random Ramblings...

sorry about the lack of posting lately. First it was school kicking my ass, then I was on vacation, now work is the culprit! It's our busy post-holiday season, where everyone is either running to the spa to try to recover from Christmas madness, or they're redeeming gift cards they received as presents. So I was asked to work extra days and extra hours at our flagship spa this week and next. Yay, money! But man, I'm beat already, and I'm not even half-way through the insanity.

ANYWAY, I do have some posts up my sleeves, so to speak, but here are some random thoughts and events I decided to share with my faithful readers:

-there's another dog that likes to join us on our walks on occasion now. At least I know *this* one's not supposed to be loose. She's a young, beautiful mini-schnauzer named Jasmine. Pretty sad that the owners keep "accidentally" letting her slip out the door. It would be tragic if she got run over.

-can you think of any good reason a grown woman should use the phrase "tee-tee" to refer to urination? I didn't think so...

-my pets' medical purgatory is finally over. Called the vet today and was informed that Harley's fungal culture was negative, after waiting three weeks for the results. *WHEW* HUGE sigh of relief. This has been an on-going saga of quarantine, keeping the kittens separate from the dogs, 24/7. Making sure no cross-contamination occurred. Shit, first it was ringworm (then CONTINUING ringworm on my dogs, then just Harley), then tapeworms (one kitten), then earmites (both kittens), then tapeworms AGAIN (the *other* kitten), it just seemed never-ending. Now, finally, I can open the doors and let the cats into my room. Let the dogs out into the living room, let all the critters play together. It's a really good feeling.

-Silver and I were at Walmart after work today, and as we were about to push our cart across an aisle, we had to stop at the last moment to let a young boy cross in front of us, lest we smash into him. When he glanced to his left and saw us, he hastily murmured, "Excuse me!" and hurried past. As Silver and I continued on down the cereal aisle, she wiped an imaginary tear from her eye and said, "My faith in humanity has been restored! That kid said, 'Excuse me!'"
I laughed.

-I read today at Cracked.com about a giant catfish called the goonch catfish of the Kali River that EATS PEOPLE. Pulls 'em right under the surface and chomps them dead. I don't know about you, but I find that seriously fucked up. And creepy. I didn't know catfish had teeth, for God's sake! When I mentioned my dismay to Silver about a man-eating fish, she looked at me blankly and said, "Uh, Mom? SHARKS are fish, you know..."

Duh, I knew that! To me, somehow, a man-eating, river-dwelling catfish is way worse.

Merry Christmas!

I hope everyone reading this has a truly wonderful Christmas Day. Full of love and joy, because as a wise friend told me, family and love are what really matter on this day.



Our Chibi-tree. And yes, the wreath has a picture of Chibi-Silver in the middle! It was a decoration she made for us in first grade. The tree is alive and was a gift given with love by dear friends who knew I didn't have one. To me, receiving this tree is what Christmas is all about.

Wednesday was special...

because I spent some time with two lovely ladies. My daughter Silver:



And Holly:



Snark flew, hilarity ensued, and much food was consumed.

Thanks for introducing us to a wonderful new (to us) eatery, Holly!

We'll have to get together again real soon. And I still owe you that massage...

Almost Christmas...

and I wanted to share my very favorite German Christmas carol, "Es ist ein Ros' Entsprungen". I found this version on Youtube, by the Thomanerchor from Leipzig. What makes it so remarkable to me is that this is the exact same arrangement my school choir used when we performed it so many years ago. *sigh* I miss singing. But at least I can sing along with this, I don't think the choir will mind!



I hope you enjoy it!

Just because you're cute...

won't spare you my WRATH if you ask the wrong question!

I'm a respecter of age...

which is why I didn't boot you in the head. I'm sorry if you found my request that you and your companion refrain from jabbering during "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" unreasonable. I thought "Ladies, could you please not talk during the movie. Thanks," was perfectly polite. Replying with "There are plenty of other seats in the theater!" was unacceptable, especially since Silver and I were there first. Also, I'm happy that this was your "special outing", but if all you wanted to do is talk, you should have gone to a cafe. If you desire to give a movie the MST3K treatment, or if one of you needs explanations for everything, rent a dvd and stay home.

Anniversary...

One year ago today I rolled into town, driving a gigantic rental truck with Silver trailing behind in my car. I was so happy to leave Las Vegas behind, and I'm still grateful, especially when I read about the state of the economy there.

There have been some upheavals along the way, including another move (and the acquisition of a MUCH better roommate in the process) and the addition of two kittens to my family.

I've had one job the whole time, but two others have come and gone. Such is the massage business.

I've gone back to school and managed to get pretty good grades, all leading me to be able to apply for nursing school in the spring.

Most importantly, I've been able to connect with dear friends and make new ones. And that's the best part of all.

Am I happier than I was one year ago? You bet your ass. Immeasurably so.

That's all that matters.

Overheard at the Spa...

Overly loud, obnoxious client, who's possibly drunk: "Yeah, I got lower back pain and pain in my butt-tocks...so don't be afraid to touch me there!"

Me, thinking: "Don't worry, Buster. Your ass doesn't scare me!"

For all you non-Facebookers...

I have my final grades for the semester, w00t!

Microbiology: 97

Anatomy and Physiology I: 94

Oh, and I had a voicemail from the college yesterday, they'd like me to tutor A&P I next semester...yikes!

Hermit(crab)Dog...

likes my pillowcase and the pillow inside it...



Harley is a weird dog, but I love him!

Ghostdog

You know you're tired when...

Overheard in the car at OHMYGOD o'clock last night, coming home from picking up Silver at the airport:

Me: I've spent water like money the last two days.

Silver: *blink blink*

Me: ...

Me: Oh, you know what I mean!

Silver: *laughing uproariously*

Momentous occasion...

Captured after I got to work, since I didn't want to plow into anyone while I was driving. Of course, now that my warranty is kaputt, I'm assuming that my vehicle will rapidly follow.

*sigh*

Here's hoping I'm wrong!

---

Edited: Thanks to my daughter, I was able to upload a better copy of the pic onto Photobucket. Silver comes in handy! ;)

*sigh*

I'm sure I'll tarnish my halo in your eyes, Faithful Readers, but I just had to mention this...it's incredibly sad and fucked up to see horrendously ugly identical twins.

It's unfair of me to say it, you can't help what you look like (to a huge degree, anyway), and it shouldn't make any difference at all, but when you see an ugly person (and I mean REALLY ugly), then BOOM, another person who looks *exactly* like that ugly person walking right behind him/her, something in your brain malfunctions until all you can do is continuously whimper, "Mommy, make it stop!"

Just thought I'd share this observation.

I'm back!

I had the Best. Vacation. EVAR.

I did a little too much of everything, which is always awesome.

And I massaged my youngest client to date, a charming five-year-old who had us in stitches as she moaned, in her piping voice, "Ohhhhhhhh, dis feews SO GOOOOOOOD! I'm da Queen of Wewaxation!"

I had tears running down my face, I was (silently) laughing so hard.

:)

Now it's back to work, back to the gym, back to making better food choices (*ahem*)...and in two days Silver will be here to help me celebrate Christmas, yay!

I see Y'all did leave some bacon for me...thanks!

Happy Birthday!

Wow. How time flies when you're getting old having fun!

My babies are seventeen today! SEVENTEEN. One more year until they're legally adults. That's scary.

Tally is the older, by 21 agonizing minutes. (Yes, I say it that way EVERY TIME. I'm the mom, I'm allowed.)

Then there's Chaos.

Two beautiful, smart, talented young women whom I'm proud to call my daughters.

Every parent should be so lucky.

Happy Birthday, Babies! I'm so proud of you. I love you very much.

Hiatus

Well, stick a fork in me, I'm done.

My last final is over and I'm getting out of here tomorrow. I expect to be AFK for about a week, but I will be checking my email.

So take care of the joint for me, will ya?

Just don't eat all the bacon. That's for me.

Go fuck yourself with a Saguaro.

And I mean that with all sincerity, AARP!



Great, first creepy old men hitting on me, then I get THIS in the mail! And no, I don't want the free travel bag with AARP emblazoned on it, either. Because I really don't want to walk around with a bag that screams, "Yes, I'm an old fart."

Now get off my lawn!

---

Yes, I'm aware I used ghetto photoshop.

And yes, I'm really mailing that back to them.

Public Service

I thought I'd help y'all out on a sucky Monday, and everyone could use a CPR refresher, right?

So make with the clicky, already!

---

H/T to B, who emailed me the link.

Creep Factor Eleven

I was hustling into the hotel this morning on my way to the spa just as an older gentleman exited. He shivered ostentatiously and said "Brrrrr!"
I replied, "Yeah, it's FREEZING today!" (Note to self: Refrain from talking to random strangers.)
Guy looked me up and down and said in the smarmiest, most suggestive tone EVAR, "Makes you want to...snuggle up with someone..."

I put on the turbo as I passed him and tossed over my shoulder, "Yeah, like my DOGS!"

Silent Sentinel

As I perambulate my way around the trailer park with my dogs, I often notice a shadow trailing us. I'm never alarmed, because this shadow has become familiar to me.

It's somebody's dog that roams free 24/7. He's a Pembroke Welsh Corgi mix, looks close to breed standard, except for having floppy ears.

He's eerily quiet; as a matter of fact, I've never heard him make any sound at all, ever.

But he likes to follow us around. He pees where my dogs pee yet never comes close enough for me to pet him. My dogs totally ignore him, which is VERY odd, since normally they go ape-shit and try to play with every dog they see. Maybe they've gotten used to our shadow, too.

*Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh*...

That's the huge sigh of relief I heaved last night as I was driving back from campus.

Yesterday was the worst crunch day for Microbiology EVAR. Last lecture exam. Final lab exam. Presentation to give. Completed lab notebook to turn in. Extra credit paper due.

BUT I DID IT ALL. And I'm pretty confident that I totally kicked ass. I really liked our group presentation on Mycobacterium tuberculosis. As our intro, we stood in front of the class, and I shouted "Head's UP! Every second of every day, someone in the world is infected with Mycobacterium tuberculosis...and today is *YOUR* unlucky day!"

Then all four of us tossed out snack-sized packs of Mike and Ike (representing the rod-shaped bacterium), and we also tossed out six fuzzy microbes into the crowd, just to mix things up a bit. It was a big hit. We were the third of six presentations, and we needed to wake up the class. No worries, we tossed out some Hot Tamales candies later on, representing the most common medicine for TB. ;)

Now I only have my Micro final next Tuesday to look forward to, but since according to my calculations I only need to get a 22 on said final to get an A in the entire class, I'm not sweating it!

I'm all done with A&P, thankfully. As far as I know, I have an A in that class as well, but I'll be able to check my grade tomorrow. w00t!

So. Happy.

Now I can look forward to my winter break, and then next semester is A&P II and Statistics. Then in the spring I'll be eligible to apply for the nursing program.

Everything is falling into place, and it's really nice when some things do go according to plan.