Friday, October 04, 2013

Creepy McCreeperson

Had a client today who reminded me of Joe Pesci's character in the Lethal Weapon movies, and he gave off a weird vibe. He was either mentally ill in some way or he was high.

He was one of those clients who starts getting undressed the moment they walk through the door of the treatment room. Shoes kicked off and fingers unbuttoning the shirt. I reminded him to wait until I left the room to undress, and he pulled the shirt off and said, "See, I'm wearing a t-shirt!" No, it was an undershirt, there's a difference, and it's still inappropriate. These people are so worried about not getting the full time on their massage, they usually say things like, "I'll be done so quickly, you don't even need to leave the room!"
As did my client yesterday. Yeah, no. That doesn't fly.

He never crossed the line during our session, but he said a few things that put me on high alert, and made me choose my replies very carefully.

"What can we do to help me relax?" Ew. Just ew.

After he turned over to lie on his back, and I asked him how he was, he said,

"I feel GREAT. But enough is never enough...if you know what I mean."

Also EW.

But by far the oddest exchange happened right at the end, when I was massaging his neck and shoulders.
He looked up at me earnestly and said in a low voice,

"I apologize, Christina...and I know this is taking it too far, but do you massage...the face?!"



No, I didn't say that.

I assured him that I do indeed massage the face, and all was well in his universe.

After tipping me a measly 12 bucks and raving about my mad skillz to the front desk, he went on his way.


1 comment:

Suldog said...

See, this is one of the reasons why I much prefer same-sex massage. It is far less likely that I'll say or do something that may be misinterpreted. I don't have to stay on edge thinking about whether any conversation I make, or any request I have, might be taken the wrong way, as some sort of come on.

(Not that I believe you were necessarily misinterpreting this situation, but same-sex - and assuming no homosexual intent - avoids ever having to even consider it.)