If you've just spent the past six hours walking around the Strip in 100+ degree weather, I DON'T CARE THAT YOU TOOK A SHOWER THIS MORNING. Take another fucking shower before I massage you. It won't kill you, and it will prevent me from wanting to kill you because of your disgusting and rank odor.
If you insist on wearing shorts when I massage you, I appreciate cool ones, like the Simpsons ones a client was wearing yesterday.
If you're a female who's training for MMA events, don't take testosterone.*
I don't care if you're convinced it will help you win your fights.
a)Everyone can tell you're taking it.
b)The effects are irreversible.
c)It's scary, especially your beard stubble and the obvious sideburns you try to shave off.
*Okay, so this has nothing to do with the spa, per se. Consider these bonus tips!