Saturday, April 25, 2009

If ever anyone needed a punch to the face...

I massaged a young man this afternoon who'd never had a massage before. I knew he was enjoying it, he was very relaxed, and as I finished with a nice scalp and neck massage, he even started falling asleep.

Now, when I finish a massage, I never say anything like, "We're done," or "Time's up," or anything like that. I always thank my client, by name. The usual response I get is, "No, thank YOU, Christina!"

So what does this punk say?

"Is that it?"


I'm sorry, did you just ask me if that was it?!

What, did he expect the "bow-chicka-bow-bow" soundtrack to start, and me to ask in my sultriest voice (which is pretty damn sultry, I'll have you know), "Why, Sir...did you want anything...else?"

Some people.

Hey, but thanks for the tip, Bud.


Blondefabulous said...

Sounds like someone had been watching too many TV shows.... LOL!

You should have played along and whipped out a fake police badge.... Ha ha ha!

Christina LMT said...


Well, maybe I'm overreacting a teeny bit. Maybe he just meant "Wow, time's up already? Too bad!"
Yeah. That's it. I need to keep trying to see the best in people, instead of expecting the worst.

Buck said...

"I need to keep trying to see the best in people, instead of expecting the worst."

THAT is very hard to do, these days. I'm not saying the best doesn't ever happen -- it's just that it's so rare when it does.

But hey! Bright side: tip!

Christina LMT said...

Yup, you're exactly right, Buck!
Tips are always appreciated. Especially from jackasses.

Zelda said...

I must say, I loved the way you said 'thank you' at the end of my massage. Like I was doing you a favor! You're a good closer. :-)

Christina LMT said...

No, thank YOU, Zelda!

Well, I DO thank my client for permitting me to do the massage. I mean, how could I do massage without the client, right? It takes a large amount of trust to go into a dark room with (most likely) a stranger, get naked, then let that stranger rub you all over. So I appreciate the fact that they let me do it, and PAY me, too!

Kevin said...

Hope you waited until after the tip to deliver the punch :)

Christina LMT said...

Heh. He got a smile and a thank-you. My thoughts, however, are NOT censored!

Anonymous said...

No, sorry, you have to buy egg roll to get happy ending! WTF? I'm going to mail you a taser just so you can drive stun the crap out of these fools.

Christina LMT said...

OOOOOOH! I like the idea of watching those assholes jerk and twitch and lose control of their bladders...BUT I really need to keep my job and I don't think jail is for me. But I'll still take the taser...just in case! ;)